In The Name Of LOVE
Tue, 2011-07-12 14:54 — admin
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Archived from February 14-20, 2008 MALAYSIAN TODAY
In The Name Of LOVE
People do the craziest things in the name of love; and when it’s Valentine’s Day, even crazier things, in the hope of winning over the heart of the other.
As a profession of their undying, unconditional love, many would go out of their way, beyond the box of heart-shaped chocolates and bouquets of red roses, to convince, prove and hopefully win over the other’s affections. So, what have you got all loved-up for your sweetheart today? If you haven’t yet thought of anything, you’d better do so now while you still have the rest of the day to think up of something special. If you’re lack of ideas, you could take a tip or two from some experiences below and make them your own. Better late than loveless. Then again, you would notice that in some instances, sadly, it doesn’t pay to pursue if the other party’s not into you. As they say, love is a two-way street, so, while you’re head over heels, you need to be smart about it. We don’t want you to have your head in the clouds but end up misty eyed. So, good luck with lady love this Valentine’s. May cupid draw back his bow for you! INTO THE SUNSET I had always dreamed of proposing to my girlfriend on a very special day, in a most spectacular way that would leave her in awe and that would prove to her how very much I love her. But sadly, this was not meant to be. My girlfriend and I parted ways late last
year after being together for a bit more than four years. She found someone else. I tried my best to win her back but I guess, what made it even more difficult for me was the fact that she had also fallen out of love with me. For months I pined for her. I was a wreck. Even at work I couldn’t function well. And at the back of my mind, there was still this grand plan. Alas, now there was no one to share it with. As painful as it was, I knew that I had to let go of my dream to share my life with her, and of that special event I had imagined for both of us, that would surely have brought tears of joy to her eyes. In releasing all I held dear to me, I decided to pass over this idea to my best friend, who was about to ropose to his own sweetheart. On Valentine’s Day last year, I got a friend in Langkawi to lend me his beautiful, luxurious yacht for a day. Together with the boat, I had a dud crew all in place to play along with the whole idea. Under the pretext of getting some lessons on sailing, my friend invited his girlfriend to Langkawi and onto the yacht. The crew then taught them both the ropes. They had a really
good time. Later that evening, when we were in the middle of the sea, my friend distracted his girlfriend while his parents and siblings, and her parents and siblings, who had flown back from an Indonesian holiday, just for this, and their closest friends, came on board. That was when my friend went onto his knees and proposed to his girlfriend: On Valentine’s Day, on a yacht, against the sunset, in the middle of the sea, with her family and loved ones beside her, he asked her, “Will you marry me?”. While I was so happy for my friend and his fiance. It cut me to pieces thinking that that could have been me and her. But my heart bled, I knew that this was the only way I could finally let go. Find my own peace and
move on. LOVE FOR SALE, NOT! Love hurts, they say. Tell me about it! I’ve long realised that sometimes, you need to learn the hard way and get painfully knocked about as there are no true fail-proof guides out there for you to learn from and flourish. My boyfriend, or rather the guy I was interested in, turned out to be a real jerk! Thank God, I’m so, over him now. Before I go on, firstly, let me tell you that I’m not a traditionalist where love is concerned. I don’t mind making the first move,
really, as I believe, the early bird catches the worm. Unfortunately, in my case, this little bird caught a slimy centipede which in the end left me with an excruciatingly painful sting I can’t forget right up till this day.Sigh. I guess, I have to admit that, to a big extent, it was my fault as well. Still, he could have been a whole more decent, if not nicer! I had won two tickets to Bali and a twonight stay at one of the resorts there. So, I decided, what better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day with the guy I admired, who obviously had never travelled anywhere out of the country in his entire life. I wanted it to be a special treat for him. Something he’d remember me by, for the rest of his life. And to show that I wasn’t interested in anything else but his company, I booked another room for myself. This was the ultimate gift I thought. In the past, I had bought him so many presents; when I think about it today, the amount is simply dumbfounding! When I was in New York for a holiday, I literally went mad picking personal items out for him, mostly branded stuff: Armani shirts, Versace ties, dunhill cufflinks, Levis jeans, Bally shoes, right up to the Calvin Klein briefs, boxer shorts and socks. On one occasion, his birthday, I even had a very costly portrait of him drawn by an artist at Pasar Seni. We celebrated the night in a suite at a 5-star hotel I had filled up with balloons (you can imagine what I went through trying toget the hotel to help me with the helium gas). I made all the party arrangements, cakes, food, musicians, etc, etc, etc, and invited his close friends too. All in the name of love. Yes, I am a go-getter. And yes, maybe I was asking for trouble, trying to win the love of this guy by showering him with things I thought would endear me to him. How wrong I was. But did he have to treat me the way he did? This was what happened in Bali. Upon landing, we spent the remainder of the day on an all expenses- paid shopping trip for him as we toured the island. On the second night, he decided we should go have some fun at
Hard Rock Bali. This was after he had gone water skiing, gocarting, snorkling and lunch at a beautiful six-star hotel. I was rather pooped, but game all the same, for him. I was happy that he was enjoying himself. How could he not, right? Then as we were about to leave, a man approached him: “Massage? Girls?” “Young and pretty girls?” He asked. To my disgust, my dear partner asked me to give him a moment with the guy and asked me to stand in a corner. The discussion between them lasted for about 10 whole minutes and in the end, the guy I thought I knew and really liked asked if I could get a cab and meet him back at the resort later that night. I reminded him that the person he was talking to was a pimp, and asked him if he knew what he was getting into. He said he was just going for a
massage. That was when I put my foot down and insisted that he not follow the man: Rather, I begged him not to. I was so pathetic then. I couldn’t even recognise myself and what I was saying. But he remained adamant, nd I had to let him go. It was about 5am when I heard him walk into his room.
Of course I got out and questioned him about the incident. I wanted to know how he could have been so callous and insensitive towards my feelings. You know what? He was so rude, mean and hurtful. He even admitted that he had had some “fun”. That was when he also told me that he didn’t really care for me but “entertained” me just because I liked him so much. I decided to not pursue this obviously one-sided relationship hen we got back to Kuala Lumpur. We didn’t communicate after that. But guess what? Out of the blue, he called me one day, tell ing me that he was about to get married. I congratulated him and wished him luck. Before I could put down the phone he asked me: “Hey, what would you like to get me for my wedding present? How about this: You could buy or just rent a few outfits for us. That would be great!” A whole lot stronger and wiser after what I had gone through, what do you think my answer to his suggestion was? A clue: Two short words, before I slammed down the phone... with a smile. PERSEVERANCE PAYS It started on Valentine’s Day: My relationship with this guy whom I met six years ago. It began with a huge bouquet of flowers that never stopped coming for a whole three months. I actually met my present partner half-a year before that. He used to come for meetings at my office. He was one of the young directors in his father’s company. At that time I was already with someone. We had been together for a year. He was also with someone for about the same duration. I guess it was love at first sight for him when we first met. From that time on he would do little things to win my heart even though I told him that I was with someone else. He told me right in front of my face that he liked me and that he’d pursue me no matter what. We became friends from then on but nothing more than that for some time. It was just him calling me once in awhile just to wish me good morning and that sort of thing. A month after we became acquainted, he’d sometime drive all the way from Klang where his office was and wait in a corner in Damansara where my office was to just wave as I drive off towards home. I asked him why he was in the corner and he replied: “It makes me happy just to see your face”. Sometimes I’d find affectionate notes on parking tickets under my windscreen which would say “Miss You” or “Love You”. Sometimes it would be little poems but what really swept me off my feet was when he started sending bouquet after bouquet starting Valentine’s
Day. After three months he had won my heart and I was ready to be his. My partner and I parted ways and he did the same with his partner. So far, things have been so wonderful between the two of us. I think he’s got something planned for me this Valentine’s Day. He always does. And, when he does something he does it in a big way which always captures my heart. WITHOUT YOU… I’ve known Hetty for as long I can remember. She was my neighbour, my friend and my partner in crime. She was perfect. She was my girlfriend. We had been seriously dating for about five years although we’d been in love with each other longer than than. We had a typical relationship like every other couple at our age. That was brought to another level when Hetty turned 20 (she is two years younger than me).
Our parents decided that we should make commitment as they knew we were going to end up together anyway. Our parents wanted us to get engaged. I know we were young and had our whole lives ahead of us, but we didn’t have a problem with that because we knew how strong our love was or
each other. We picked a date for our engagement. We wanted it to be special so we decided to
pick Valentine’s Day. All the preparations were done. A few weeks before the engagement, Hetty fell ill. She fainted and was rushed off to the hospital. The doctors were not able to determine what was wrong with her so they did blood tests and conducted a biopsy.I forgot about the incident as there was so much to do before our engagement. Then on Valentine’s Day, I woke up excited and raring to go. I was looking forward to celebrate the day with Hetty. At noon, just as I was about to wrap Hetty’s Valentine/ engagement present, I received a call from Hetty. She had just received a call from the doctors. They wanted her to immediately book herself in the hospital. The doctors had diagnosed
her with breast cancer. It had spread to the bone and the doctors wanted her to start her treatment as soon as possible. I cried so much that day. It was supposed to be a special Valentine’s Day for the both of us, instead it turned out to be the most painful day I could never forget in my life. We got engaged that day. I decided without any hesitation that I would be by her side no matter what. And I guess that was also a gift of love and sincerity. Hetty passed away eight months later. I know that she would have made me a happy man for life but I guess God loves her more. I have moved on since then. I still think about her all the time but I know that she is in a better place now. To my dearest Hetty, may you rest in peace. CUPID’S MYSTERIOUS WAYS... I have fancied this ‘hottie’ from my college for a very long time but I never actually thought that I would ever get a chance to speak to her, let alone date her. So one fine day, when a friend of mine introduced me to his lab partner in college, I was dumbstruck and lost for words. His lab partner was Mimi, the girl of my dreams. She noticed that I was nervous but didn’t laugh or put me down. Instead she was really nice to me. We became pals and I realised that I was falling for her real hard. That is when I decided that I would ask her out on Valentine’s Day. I wanted my first date to be a real special one. She jumped at the idea and we decided to meet at her favourite restaurant Chilli’s in Bangsar. I was supposed to meet her at 6.00pm for a drink and a meal afterwards. I had the whole night planned for her. It was going to be really special. Two hours and four lattes later I realised that she had stood me up. She wasn’t picking up her calls and none of her friends knew where she had gone. I was feeling a bit sad but at the same time,
I was feeling even worse for the lady who was seated behind my table. She had just found out that her boyfriend of two years was about to leave her on Valentine’s Day (I wasn’t eavesdropping, they were loud). She was crying and begging him not to leave but he said that he didn’t love her anymore. He
walked away just as I was about to leave the restaurant. I turned and saw her, crying and felt that it was my duty to console her. I went up to her and asked her if she needed someone to talk to. As she was so distressed and heartbroken, she started telling me what happened. Then I started telling her about my sad story and by the end of the night we both realised that we had been chatting for almost three hours. I dropped her home as I knew it was the right thing to do and realized that we actually lived nearby each other. We exchanged numbers and kept in touch. As for the ‘hottie’ from my college, I realized that she was not as sincere as she seemed. Furthermore, my attention is now only for the most gentle and sweetest girl who is also an aspiring doctor. Yes, it only took us about two months to realise that we had so much in common and that we were in love. We are now happily engaged and hopefully will be seeing wedding bells soon.